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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23439649">accepting deceit</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/diasybe/pseuds/diasybe'>diasybe</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Spoilers for Episode: Selfishness v. Selflessness</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 12:29:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,120</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23439649</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/diasybe/pseuds/diasybe</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of Selfishness vs. Selflessness, a defeated Deceit corners the sides in the mind palace. He's been trying to help Thomas put his future and career ahead of what he sees as unimportant events, but the other sides don't recognize that. They only see the lies he tells. Frustrated and hurt by his role as the "bad guy", he asks Virgil how he managed the hatred of the other sides, to which Virgil replies, "I realized how much I was hurting Thomas, so I left. I ducked out. But I realized that I was more than just Anxiety... Thomas was worse off without me. So I came back... and the others realized it too." Deceit then creates his master plan: In order for the other sides and Thomas to appreciate the work he does, he'll have to "duck out". But without Deceit, the sides can't lie to themselves - or each other. Truths are told and secrets revealed in this "what if" story.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>accepting deceit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This work was inspired by Selfishness vs. Selflessness and contains dialogue from that episode. All credits for that dialogue, as well as characters, go to Thomas Sanders.</p>
<p>This will only have a few chapters... this is really just an opportunity for me to write Sanders Sides angst while giving justice to the slimy boi.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Wait… what?”</p><p>The words rang through Deceit’s head, adding to the unpleasantness of being forced from the mind palace.</p><p>
  <em> I hereby sentence you to one day at the Saint Clifford’s Chapel on the day of Lee and Mary Lee’s wedding. </em>
</p><p>Roman sighed. “It’s my sworn duty to help Thomas achieve his hopes and dreams. But Thomas wouldn't dream of attaining his hopes through deceitful means.”</p><p><em> No, no, no! </em> How had this happened? “But that’s not true!” he protested. A sick feeling swooped through his stomach at the smiles Virgil and Patton were giving the Prince. Couldn’t they see? <em> They’ll ruin Thomas's life! </em></p><p>“And you’re a beacon of truth?” Virgil muttered sarcastically.</p><p>“Oh, did I say that?” Deceit snarled, glaring at his <strike> friend</strike>. “I <em> missed </em> the part where I said that!”</p><p>Thomas glanced at him. Deceit almost laughed (it was either that or scream) at the confusion on his face. “I don’t understand. You got what you wanted; you proved that I’m not as honest as I’d like to believe.”</p><p>“But you’re still missing the point!” Frustration pounded at him, fraying his nerves. Making him - and the others - acknowledge that Thomas wasn’t a perfect person was a happy accident! “Didn’t it seem <em> kind of ridiculous</em>, taking this matter <em> so seriously </em> to the point of settling it in a <em> legal setting</em>!?” His gestures grew more erratic; he felt himself losing them.</p><p>They began to murmur amongst themselves with the exception of Virgil, who had not taken his glare off of Deceit since they had returned to the real world. (<em>When had that happened? When had Virgil started to see him as the enemy?) </em></p><p>“It seemed pretty important.” Patton shrugged, the sleeves of his hoodie flapping slightly.</p><p>“I do that kind of stuff of stuff all the time,” Roman said sheepishly.</p><p>Deceit inhaled. He had no idea how Logan dealt with these two all the time; they were exhausting, though it seemed Virgil was enjoying himself if the smirk he flashed at Deceit was any indication. “Whoooh!” Deceit's voice was getting louder and louder, but he couldn’t help himself. “Okay, <em> let me put it this way. </em> Life… is like a piñata.”</p><p>“Colorful and full of stuff that makes you happy?”</p><p>Deceit had to give Patton an incredulous stare, but at least he was listening. And if Patton was listening, so would the others. “<em>S</em><em>ure</em>. And you want that stuff that makes you happy, <em> right!</em>?”</p><p>“Do I!” Patton exclaimed.</p><p>“Do I,” murmured Roman at the same time. Deceit spared him a sharp glance. He hadn’t missed the Prince’s underlying turmoil, but this wasn’t the right time to bring it up.</p><p>He continued with his explanation, softening his tone. “Well, in order to get that <em> stuff</em>, you must attack the piñata!”</p><p>Roman lifted his chin.</p><p>“But you’re wearing a blindfold right now,” Deceit continued, aiming the force of his gaze at Patton. It was Morality whom he needed to convince.</p><p>Patton touched his eyes and Deceit fought the urge to roll his eyes. “You can keep playing the blindfold on if you like the game better that way, but if you take it off-”</p><p>Virgil glanced at him. <em>You know what I'm talking about, Virgil.</em></p><p>“-it’s easier to get that stuff you want!”</p><p>“Attack the piñata?” Thomas asked slowly, turning to face Deceit.</p><p>
  <em> Yes! Finally, he’s beginning to understand- </em>
</p><p>“I believe he's suggesting that you beat someone up…” <em> What? </em> “...And rob their unconscious body, right?”</p><p>Deceit stared at Roman. “NO!” he raged. <em>You were supposed to be the smarter twin!</em></p><p>A look of confusion passed the Prince’s features. “No…?”</p><p>He felt like screaming. “I am <em> trying </em> to teach you a <em> lesson</em>, but it’s <em> literally impossible </em>!”</p><p>“Falsehood.”</p><p>
  <em> No. </em>
</p><p>His time was up.</p><p>He might as well accept defeat. Now there was no chance of anyone listening to him.</p><p>The sound of his rage and frustration and helplessness roared in his ears, building to a crescendo of noise that muffled the others’ various noises of welcome. Deceit slid to the side as Logan rose up, rolling his eyes at the smug fury on his face.</p><p>“Why don’t you just leave the teaching to me?”</p><p>There, with everyone so happy to see Logic return, Deceit stood pressed up against the wall like a cornered animal. The small smile that Virgil gave Logan was almost too much, he almost left then and there, but he had a duty to Thomas… even if the others didn’t recognize it… he had to keep trying.</p><p>
  <em> Why don’t you just leave the teaching to me? </em>
</p><p><em> (Because you aren’t teaching Thomas the things that matter! </em> he wanted to scream. <em> You are giving in to the whims of emotions! You are teaching him that he is unforgivable if he puts himself, his career, and his future above an event in the lives of his friends!) </em></p><p>“Aha! There he is,” Thomas said. He sounded more sure of himself.</p><p><em> Yes, there he is</em>, Deceit thought unhappily. <em> And my time is up</em>.</p><p>“Great.” He poured all of his bitterness into that one word. “Well, I’m sure Thomas’s friends would <em> love </em>to hear that he’s forcing himself to attend their wedding.”</p><p>Logan tensed, but he didn’t have to worry. Deceit knew when to admit defeat, and now was not the time to continue this debate. Patton frowned. (Good, that was good, if he could at least make them <em> question </em> the ridiculous decision they had come to-)</p><p>“It’s clear you all don’t want to listen to reason,” Deceit hissed, “but hear this.”</p><p>
  <strike> (The smile, that heart-wrenching <em> smirk </em> that Virgil flashed, because he knew Deceit was leaving, the answering smile that Roman gave him) </strike>
</p><p>(It was almost too much, how much they hated him. How determined they were to make him the bad guy.)</p><p>A voice that sounded like Remus spoke in his mind. <em>Good and bad is all made-up nonsense.</em> Yes, it was, wasn't it? The thought gave him the strength to continue.</p><p>“I will <em> always </em> be a part of you.”</p><p>He pulled aside his cloak to reveal his logo: two yellow snakes twined around each other.</p><p>Thomas stared. Deceit ignored the <strike>panic</strike> in Virgil's eyes. There was a pause as Logan and Roman traded glances, broken by a sound from Patton.</p><p>“Ooh, look at the lil tongues,” Patton cooed. Deceit shot him a glance, annoyed at the lengths his flip side would go to remove any tension.</p><p>“I’m not going anywhere,” <em>another untruth</em> <em>(why did the sight of Virgil’s frustration hurt so much?)</em>, “and there are smarter ways to get people to do what you want, anyway.”</p><p>He was done here. <em> There’s nothing I can say to Thomas to make him reconsider… </em></p><p>Deceit sank down, reappearing in the mind palace.</p><p>
  <em> ...But maybe I can still convince the others. </em>
</p>
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